


#106: Infinity-Sided Die

by kokoro_kikoeru



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Additional Warnings/Tags In Author's Notes, Anthology, Drabble Collection, Multi, One Shot Collection, Shit Ton of AUs :D, Sleep is Overrated, The Author Regrets Nothing, i am very very obesessed with that, if there are any mistakes please tell me, please read the author's notes for other info and stuff, prompt collection, well not really "one-shots"
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-12
Updated: 2017-10-12
Packaged: 2018-11-18 09:18:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11288292
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kokoro_kikoeru/pseuds/kokoro_kikoeru
Summary: “Ah-ah! But I can show you a little something I brought back with me—an infinity-sided die.”“Woah... that’s so cool! And impossible!”“These things are outlawed in 9000 dimensions! You want to know why? Look at those symbols. Infinite sides means infinite outcomes! If I rolled it, anything could happen—our faces could melt into jelly, the world could turn into an egg... or you could just roll an eight. Who knows.”— Stanford Pines and Dipper Pines (dialogue taken from“Dungeons, Dungeons and More Dungeons”, Season 2 Episode 13 ofGravity Falls)





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is essentially the summaries list for the AUs found in this fic so far (some of these don't have a one-shot for them yet but a one-shot will be written for them eventually. already in the process of writing some too. there were actually a few more but i decided to make them their own stories so yeah).

  
List of Currently Explored Possibilities  
*ʟᴀsᴛ ᴜᴘᴅᴀᴛᴇᴅ ₁₀/₉/₂₀₁₇

* * *

**Babysitter Bill AU**

It was first for the hours. Then it was for the money. Now it’s for the kid.

Bill Cipher knew very, very well that he was a horrible person.

He just didn’t think he was this bad.

 

* * *

 

 **De** ** _-man_** **AU**  
**(Another Human Bill AU)**

Mason “Dipper” Pines will confess that he’s fucked up a multitude of times afore, but never before had he fucked up _this_ badly. Or rather—to put in simpler terms—with only a short and serene walk in the woods, a careless trip, a small fall and an extended hand, he somehow managed to fuck up so severely and so horribly by resurrecting the demon that had haunted the nightmares and memories of him, his family and friends for years.  
  
Although, fortunately for them all, it seems as though the demon isn’t very demonic now at all.

 

* * *

 

 **I Think I Know A Guy AU**  
**(aka. Pun Meister Bill Cipher AU)**

_Ever had trouble making horrible wisecracks that don’t even fit into context? Too lazy to search up all those awful, repeated gags? Want to quickly ruin your friend’s day with terrible, cringe-inducing jokes? Look no more!_

**  
**_We know a guy, heck, we’ve got a guy! That’s right, ladies and gentlemen—we’ve got_ _~~dream-demon-that-will-turn-you-and-your-loved-ones-into-walking-eldritch-monstrosities-for-fun~~ _ _pun meister, Bi—ill Cipher!_

 

* * *

 

 **Short & Sweet AU**  
**(aka. Tall Chip, Small Dip AU)**

Those who thought up the widely known saying declaring that polar opposites attract were undoubtedly correct.

William “Bill” Cipher—a strapping, spontaneous freshman at Gravity Falls University with wealth, talent, looks, and height to spare.

Mason “Dipper” Pines—a lean, studious sophomore with a lot more brains than dark circles under his eyes who’s attending the very same postsecondary school.

No one could ever have predicted how inseparable the pair would become (aside from Matchmaker Mabel Pines, of course) after one of them _literally_ trips over the other.

(Here’s a spoiler: it was Bill.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **1.** I haven’t given actual, decent names to some of these AUs so uh basically some are placeholders right now. They’re not original AUs (well the majority of them so far aren’t really) but still, I need to practice titling shit. Worst comes to worst, I’ll just leave the placeholders there as the name for the AU (in this fic).
> 
> **2\. Please read the A/N’s (or, well, the serious parts of them) and the summaries of each chapter; not all of these AUs/one-shots will have a romantic pairing and the warnings, the AU and the additional tags are listed in them.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Alternate Universe:** Babysitter Bill Cipher.
> 
> **Pairing(s)** : Bill Cipher/Dipper Pines
> 
> **Warnings:** Pedophilia (well sort of), Profanity, Unhealthy Urges  & Thoughts.
> 
> **Additional Tags:** Human Bill Cipher, Kid Dipper Pines, bill's a not-very-decent teenager with a few homicidal tendencies who's pining after a seven-year-old dip, sorry if this is gross to you or something, there's never gonna be actual sex in this au tho, bill has some sense of morality don't worry

**Outcome #** 72191220

* * *

   
The golden-haired adolescent grabbed the younger’s sides roughly and abruptly, pushing the boy down into the sheets and trapping him between his tanned body and the child's bed.

He was a bit beyond his limit, or rather was trudging past his breaking point by a few steps. So what if Pine Tree was too young, too unprepared? Certainly such trivial, meaningless things have never stopped him before—have never impeded him or affected him with sentiments of guilt when getting what he desired. And right now, he wanted the frightened Dipper Pines, aged seven years.

He didn’t care anymore. It’s not like it mattered, right? The kid could certainly take it. Like the brunet had said, he was manly, meaning that he was certainly strong enough for this.

The teen didn’t need to feel ashamed for these wants and cravings since it was the lad’s fault anyways. Always flashing that angelic, lopsided smile that was the incarnation of perfection as he ran around, releasing honeyed, bell-like laughter while giving the man naughty and brisk glimpses of the soft, tempting flesh lying underneath those blasted clothes. The youngling was always ~~(obliviously and unintentionally)~~ seducing the blond, so why not?

Why not indulge himself a little? A little never hurt anyone, after all.

A small, distressed whimper pulled the fellow from his thoughts and reflections.

“B-Bill? Wha-what are yo-you doing?” stuttered the younger and unsettled Pines twin, his quivering, tiny fists gripping the other’s shirt as his limbs shook and a thin, translucent veil of tears threatened to pool and slide down those ruddy, squishy cheeks.

After several tense moments, Bill swallowed the lump that promptly formed in his throat.

_“Damn it,”_ he thought as he receded, plastering on a strained smile and ruffling the lad’s hair playfully.

“Geez, Pine Tree. I was just foolin’,” he chuckled as he mockingly winked, “Didn’t mean to scare you!”

He had confessed before and will admit it again—he was in too deep.

Dipper stared at him for a moment, furrowing his brows in confusion while processing what had transpired before registering that the older fellow’s apparent, hard blink was in actuality a taunting, teasing wink, accompanied by a provoking remark.

The boy shrugged off his former apprehension as he weakly and lightheartedly pushed the man, taking on a bashful pout.

“I-I’m not scared!” he claimed. The adolescent’s twisted, revolting heart melted at the sight and his grin wavered slightly.

“Sure, sure,” chortled the young man, “C’mon—let’s go get Shooting Star and grab something to eat. If we find her quickly, I’ll get you guys some ice cream, ‘kay kid?”

As the brunet stood up and perked up to this, nodding and celebrating delightedly, the blond inwardly scowled and cursed. Bill irritatedly realized that his gaze remained on the twin’s flushed visage that was framed by bobbing, chocolate curls for much longer than what was necessary. His grip on the younger’s hand tightened faintly and he swallowed another festering lump.

_“Goddamn it.”_

The guilt was back.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Alternate Universe:** Short  & Sweet
> 
>  **Pairing(s)** : Bill Cipher/Dipper Pines
> 
>  **Warnings:** Profanity, Implied Drinking, Implied Sex
> 
>  **Additional Tags:** College AU, College Parties, Fluff, Older Pines Twins, Human Bill Cipher, Nice Bill Cipher, Dancing, Comfort, these two are adorkable boyfriends that are good and considerate to each other, sorry if this sucks i'm not good at writing fluff :|

**Outcome # 411455060410251**

* * *

  
Maybe it was because of the stuffy, humid heat produced by the horde of inebriated college students or the pulsating, pounding sounds of EDM blaring through speakers, but regardless of whatever it was, one thing was for sure:

Parties were the bane of his existence.

He was okay with hanging out with familiar, old faces or heading somewhere with a very small group of people. Never was he one for meeting a sea of strangers, grinding up against someone else, drinking to the point beyond being shit-faced, and so on.

At least he had Bill, though.

The brunet turned his gaze from the shifting and squirming mass of people who were all dancing and packed in the other part of the room like sardines in a tin to the young man sitting beside him. The two were watching the crowd from the sidelines, idly seated on a nearby couch. The fingers of the blond’s right hand were laced and entwined with Dipper’s left while the ones of the guy’s free hand were restlessly drumming against a fairly shabby, stained armrest to the beat of the music.

Bill wanted to party and dance like the others, that much was obvious.

The young, sleep-deprived adult stared at the remainder of the swishing and sloshing liquid held by the obligatory red solo cup in his hand. He drew his lips into a thin line, contemplating something before letting an almost inaudible sigh as he forced a faint smile.

Times like these were when he’d truly realized how different they and their worlds really were.

“Y’know,” he started, catching Cipher’s attention, “you can go out there too if you want. You don’t need to force yourself to stay with me.”

Cobalt eyes widened, similar to those of a preteen found reading his father’s porn mags. The action was so short-lived that he would’ve missed it had he blinked.

The affable first-year was quick—but not quick enough—to conceal his blunder that screamed,  _“I’ve been caught!”_  by quirking his lips and slinging an arm over the shoulders of the boy beside him.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, kid.”

“You look really bored,” Dipper countered.

“Geez, Pine Tree! I think you need more glasses or something since I clearly can’t _see_ what you’re—”

“You really shouldn’t lie to your seniors, Billy Boy, especially if they’re your psychology study buddy.”

In reaction to the interruption accompanied with a smug, knowing look, the taller male looked away, uncharacteristically flustered as he grumbled something along the lines of “stupid smart guy”.

The shorter young adult let out an amused, good-natured sigh.

A serene though brief quiet passed between the couple as they listened to the thrumming beats of the song that was currently playing and the drunken shouting of their fellow peers. The introverted Pines twin was the one to break it.

“You can go if you want to. I don’t mind.”

“But you would mind joining me, right? Plus I’ll be leaving my poor, little tree all alone!” the blond dramatically cried out that last part. He threw an arm against over his eyes—well, _eye_ —swooning like some damsel in distress as he swung his legs back and forth, kicking the air while flopping back into the cushions of the sofa.

Mason smirked at his antics and singsonged, “Doesn’t mean I wouldn’t mind watching you.”

Bronzed cheeks gave away a faint blush. Another tranquil and momentary silence transpired. This time Bill broke it.

“You sure about this, Pine Tree?”

“Absolutely.”

“Really, really sure?”

“Positively.”

“Really, really, really—”

The brunet stopped the probably never-ending river of what would essentially be the same, pointless question rephrased over and over again by turning to face the man, swiftly grabbing and tugging down on the other’s collar until their faces were a mere breath apart.

“Bill, just shut up and go dance. I want to see if my boyfriend can actually pull off the legendary moves he’s been claiming to be capable of for the past few days.”

Said boyfriend smiled mirthfully, genuinely and with a noticeable hint of guilt, arctic-blue irises softening fondly at the playful challenge.

Dipper wasn’t prepared for such an uncommon expression to cross his love’s visage. Nor was he prepared for a fleeting but warm and comforting peck against the tresses curtaining his constellatory birthmark from the younger.

“I promise I’ll make this up to you, sapling,” the smitten beaut whispered fondly. The guy’s smirk grew wider at the sight of a rosy flush blooming across the pillow-soft cheeks to the originally pale-tipped ears of a certain mystery-loving lad.

“Yeah, yeah,” the second-year mumbled, shooing the other away as he bit the insides of his cheeks and turned his florid mess of a face away from the other’s gaze. “Now go have some fun.”

And with that, the Pines boy watched his eccentric other half walk away, content though somewhat forlorn…

…only for the sapphire-eyed man to come back not even five minutes after his departure, deciding to return just in order to literally carry his unwilling, bibliophilic significant other with him as he dove back into the dense flock of college students.

After weaving and struggling their way through several waves of mainly inebriated people, they eventually reached an oh-so-very marginally less busy area near one of the sides of the room. Throughout their ephemeral but still rather arduous and tedious journey, the (much) smaller male was fruitlessly kicking and releasing shouts and protests that went unheard by both Bill and the surrounding students. To the freshman, it was honestly like carrying an adorably irked, drowsy kitten.

When he finally decided to gently put the thrashing nerd in his arms down, he received a punch to the shoulder and an aggravated sigh.

“You’re such an ass!” Dipper exclaimed. The blond gave him a faux sheepish grin.

“What can I say? I started missing and worrying about my favorite tree!”

The brunet attempted to force down the redness that threatened to creep up his cheeks and threw his hands up in the air in exasperation.

“What happened to the ‘I promise I’ll make this up to you’!? You’re serio—”

The first-year abruptly cut him off by placing a finger on his sapling’s plush lips. “Shh! Just dance with me.”

His lover sputtered, flustered before a sudden anxiousness and nervousness seeped in after realizing where they currently were.

The sophomore was beginning to panic, starting to feel like everyone was staring at him—even when they actually weren’t—with scornful looks that stabbed through his body, leaving it a porous, gory carcass. It wasn’t as if he wasn’t used to this, however, due to the numerous groups of girls and guys lusting after his popular boyfriend. Thankfully, though the other was deranged and unpredictable, he was always the first to notice and the first to be there to reassure and console him all those other times, so what made this time any different?

“Bill, I-I told you! I r-really don’t like crowds an-and I’m really bad at-at dancing and I really don’t want to—!”

He was cut off again, this time by the dark-skinned man looping an arm around his waist, partially and effortlessly dipping him while being mindful of the bustling people around them and the lack of space they gave. The taller male titled his Pine Tree’s chin slightly upwards, forcing gingerbread-brown eyes as wide as dinner plates to meet relaxed and confident blue ones.

“Focus on me, kid, _just me_.”

Dipper didn’t bother trying to bite back a soft smile.

The duo danced the night away afterwards—or, well, at least until Bill began getting more “aggressive” in their dance which inevitably led to the two of them retiring early for the evening because of certain very recently-planned activities they had much, much later that night (and yes, these activities did drag out to the ungodly hours of the morning).

A few people around them had realized just how heated their dancing was becoming. It’s not like it mattered to either party, though. Many others in the room were doing the same, so the couple forgot about the world around them during their dance.

The day after, while in bed and being securely wrapped in the safety of his partner’s arms, Dipper supposed that parties aren’t all that bad, so long as he’s with Bill.


End file.
